My 1st blog dying

my 1st blog dying, because I can't express due to relationship problem...
feel annoying when I must consider the relationship b4 express....
I can't say the real thing i want, because people are evaluating...
and it often effect my real life, that is really discourage me =.="

I open a new blog, only for myself, and no open public anymore,
i will write whatever i want, no format, no rule, and no consideration,
and sure, it won't effect my real life anymore if no one know me.
actually i no mind if people wanna see or give comments in my blog,
but sorry to say, it only can apply to totally stranger out of my world.

is it possible to only view my topic as just an expression or opinion?
is it possible to only comment via internet, but not related to reality?
is it possible to only give congruence opinions and discussions?
is it possible to only available for non-rubbish comments given?
is it possible to only for open-minded and acceptance people?

Hate these "gambateh~, add oil, u can do it!, it will be fine" comments
say liao = no say, it help nothing at all, spam for fun, good-man tendacy
i want congruence+direct opinion, rather than good-man socialization
I want open+point comments, rather than talk differently behind me

I hate good-man comments, especially "good, gambateh, nice, add oil"
I hate relate my topic into my real life, internet is should only internet
I hate pointless rubbish spammer, waste time to read and disturbing
I hate being "force" to update, I have the right when and what to post

I no care if no one leave comments, at least no rubbish comments
I no care if no show ur real name, at least no backstab in real life
I no care if u criticize 100%, at least u have reasonable evaluation
I no care if u dislike me, at least it won't effect my real life socialization
.... .... .... ....

可爱的小女孩，好喜欢你

新年期间，各自回家乡，大吃大喝，闹着玩着，拿了红包，到处跑跑
放假已经几天了，在家没事做，上上网，打打game，也没什么特别
真要说特别的话，只是身体很不自然，感觉很不对劲，脑子很不正常
有种冲动，好想抱着你啊，感受你的体温，你的圆脸，你的声音 ><"

艾雯，我在想你了，想着你的声音，想着你的笑脸，想着你的拥抱
你笑眯眯地看着我，紧紧地抱着我，甜甜地说爱我，好想亲你的脸啊
好可爱的圆脸，好甜蜜的表白，好好听的声音，好直接的心情反应
哇~ 好单纯的女孩，好漂亮的女孩，好热情的女孩，好幸运的我啊 !!

还有几天，就可以去你家拜年了，其实拜年不是目的，我好想抱抱你
很想念你，很不习惯看不到你，很不习惯没有你，好想你在我身边
新年拜年咯~ 自己家没有拜年，跑到PD会情人，真的是不像样 =.="
管他啦，抱了再说，等不及了，去了PD拜年后，玩了几天才回来 XD

Thanks for loving me, Wen

Without my awareness, we in couple relationship for > 3 months
It is already consider as over the "testing" and "danger" period
I can't say for sure we are safe and happy forever, but is ok for me
I appreciate what I have now, really thank you for being with me.

My life become busy suddenly, busy to think of u, busy to care of u
U adapted into my life, and now u are in my list of considerations
Consideration of daily regulation, other than play online games
The important rank of consideration adjusting, I want u to be top
Time needed for arrangement, but I will try my best, because of u

Sorry for sometimes, I am not mentally present when u need me
Yeah, I am busy with my game as usual, as routine as daily task
I know u dislike me play online games, I really can understand it
I am trying, to quit from games, including RO, dota or whatever
Sorry for dissapointed, sorry for ignorance, sorry for loneliness

I can see ur love, ur care, ur attention on me, it is a huge wave
U remember my many word, u do many things to cheer me up
U sad for me, happy for me, worry for me, and angry for me too
I really failed to understand the reasons of worry for others
But I am congruence with myself, ur caring really touching me

I don't know what is love, and I don't know how I can love u too
Please allow me to learn, I willing to change for u, Yap AI Wen~

避免双重关系，基本原则

辅导其中一个原则，不能与客户有双重关系，哪怕是利益，或友谊关系也好，一律不被鼓励。原因是避免不必要的尴尬，也去除多余的心理障碍。打个比方，若我的朋友很看得起我，也许会害怕丢脸而不敢说心里话；若看不起我，根本不可能与我这种人分享心事，所以与陌生人辅导，大家不懂对方背景，可能这一辈子也只是见那么一次，所以效果会比较实际，也干脆磊落的。

学了很多，也常与陌生人练习辅导技巧，其实并不难，而且超有效的。实习经验多了，也慢慢习惯了，聆听已成为了生活方式，偶尔也会分析两句，有种感觉，像是过着辅导师的生活，应用所学到的面对身边的一切。

一直以来，都没什么困难，直到牵系到本身的感情问题，才深深明白不能有双重关系的道理。我常在想，既然辅导那么好，为什么不能用在其它关系上呢？也因为这原因，我常把感情关系用以辅导方式面对，希望能正面的增强感情，可惜的是原来双重关系的麻烦，在于过多的情绪交错，导致双方/单方感情用事，一切原则道理都变成垃圾，常理变成问题，分析变成解释，讨论变成恶化，沉默变成逃避，最终达成共识，当没有一回事。

虽然如此，还是深信着辅导的好处，只是不能由有双重关系的两个人一起进行，哪怕本身的修年再高，经验再多，也不得犯上辅导大忌，不然就是自找麻烦，自掘坟墓行为。